Cheap Shots

I’m feeling really lazy today, so a little humor is all that there’s going to be:

“Yesterday President Bush gave a major speech about Iraq. Today John Kerry gave a major speech about Iraq. You know what this means? The war in Vietnam may finally be over ladies and gentleman.” –Jay Leno

“We begin tonight with a simple, indisputable fact: as a young man, President George W. Bush benefited from family connections to get a place in the Texas Air National Guard, thus avoiding service in Vietnam. As you would guess, this has led to calls for the resignation of Dan Rather.” –Jon Stewart

“Bush and Kerry have agreed to three debates. The first debate will cover the 1960s and the second debate the early ’70s and in the third debate if there’s time, some topical issues.” –Jay Leno

“Over in Russia, Russian President Vladimir Putin is using terrorism to increase his power and erode his people’s civil liberties. It’s nice to see the American way of life catching up around the world.” –Jay Leno

“There’s a lot of controversy surrounding the authenticity of this memos shown on ’60 Minutes’ concerning President Bush and his service in the National Guard. If there’s one thing you don’t want to see, it’s a president who didn’t really win the election being brought down by phony documents.” –Jay Leno